How to be Successful? 8 methods to get you started!

What is your definition of being ‘successful’.

Most people strive to be better, no matter what their age. My twenties have felt like those of us who didn’t get off on the best footing, tend to be the most stubborn and committed to getting more from life? Perhaps I’m wrong. But working hard to be ‘successful’ has been an enormous weight on my shoulders throughout my teens. Was success really just how we want others to view us? Or how we actually want to feel.

Recently, I became very aware of the fact that I am almost midway through my twenties. Yes, I might not need to panic just of yet, but I am easily the oldest out of all of my friends, having been born so early in the school year. (September babies!) So am I having a mid-life crisis? Maybe? 

Feeling left behind….

Many of my peers my own age, have been settling down, having children, getting engaged and I am beginning to wonder if I am being left behind. (Not that I want to get married or have children! Sorry grandparents, not to be!) Some of my friends have even brought their first house together, as they have worked since they left school and did not go to uni! Success is defined to individuality. And for that, I have learned to stop comparing myself. 

“The only person you should try to be better than is who you were yesterday.”

-unknown

First of all, define success to yourself. What is it? Money? Define happiness to yourself. Is it again, money? Children, marriage, your own home… an admirable fit body, nice pretty clothes and dresses! In 2019, some of us even define our success by how many followers we have on Instagram!  All of these are great goals, though, admittedly questionable. Consider the question, what will make you happy when you look back on your life? And, what will make you happy right now?

1. Discover your passions (and get Motivated!)

Were you pushed towards something you didn’t enjoy at school? And felt you had to pursue that? I have friends who have been pushed towards subjects they really didn’t enjoy. I was very fortunate that I have very laid back parents, my father is a diagnostic technician (and he hates it, most of the time.) If you have no passion or energy, life feels simply lacklustre, which just won’t do. If you have got children, or financial responsibilities, I am not suggesting you quit your job, just do something that is making you happy. Take up a hobby, it could become a small side hustle or a new career! Become passionate and motivated to learn something new! Dopamine is built on passion and excitement.

2. Commitment not Motivation

Once you have found something that excites you to work towards, keep at it! I am truly a disaster at this in some ways, as I often pick up new hobbies. (sometimes, weekly.) Create commitment and results will follow…. and results often create more motivation!

3. Be open to different paths

Life is not a straight route. Often, new opportunities are thrown in your path that are completely unexpected. Or sometimes, life doesn’t go as planned and that can be a huge crushing disappointment. Having planned my career route after university and having that not work out was an enormous tear in my self esteem. I was gutted. My pride and rigidness to stick to that plan, made my recovery so much harder. I am now so much happier, having realised that I will make my own way in the world, and nothing is actually expected from me in my twenties! I haven’t let anyone down. Everyone is different. We all grow at different paces, and I’m open to where my path will take me. 

4. Grow in your workplace

Not just in your workplace but in your environment. Your family, friends.  We can learn a lot from others, especially our elders. Having a willingness to learn at work, and to improve yourself as an individual will only further your career path and kit you out for more problems in the future. Learn to resolve conflict quickly and the ability to cope under pressure, will help keep stress to a minimum. And, you will foster better relationships with those around you leading a to a more successful career ahead of you.

5. Treasure your friends, meet new people and grow your network!

We are social creatures. This is an essential part of our happiness at any age. I have friends who have settled down with their partners, and they rarely keep touch anymore. We do just get into a habit of comfort, of staying in, watching the tv and going to work the next day. We are all too busy to keep in contact now with work, family and university, but that doesn’t mean we don’t want to or don’t care. Your life will feel so much more enriched with friends. Not necessarily the more the merrier, but be open to new friendships and opportunities. A new business venture or contact could arise.

6. Manage your Money

Most successful people are good with money. I am a chronic spender, so in many ways not successful. If I see something I want, regardless of whether I need it or not, for a split second in my mind, I will either pick it up and buy it or walk away. Needless to say, saving has been a difficult skill for me to learn. If you learn to save money ahead of time, you will be prepared for those unexpected moments, like when your car breaks down or your break your phone. You will find that you are a lot less stressed in moments like that and find yourself depending a little less on others.

7. Find balance. Pushing yourself or burnout?

Successful people work hard. On a contrary note, I am still working on this one. For me, there is no in-between switch, I’m either off or on; working with total obsession or procrastinating. Commitment and motivation towards improving yourself and achieving your goals are great. You’re passionate, you’re on fire, you’re slaying in your lane! As well as being completely, utterly exhausted. If you’re completely burned out, you aren’t unlikely to want to try to achieve anything. Try to let your hair down every once in a while and remember to take breaks, holidays and to practice good self-care..

8. Set good habits for health

When I’m browsing the internet, or watching the television, the people we deem as ‘successful’ have got the perfect celebrity body… Unfortunately, not everyone is going to have a six pack, or a tiny waist, huge booty and big boobs all at the same time… Or any one of them at any single one point in their life…! (Squats somehow makes my bottom flatter, and a boob job is out of the question for me.) Eating well and getting fit, however, is an excellent model for staying healthy and but also emotionally healthy. If great skin, long hair and clear skin aren’t enough for you, how about an extended lifespan?

My Tips for Getting Motivated at the Gym:

There is no perfect blueprint for us to follow for your 20s, 30s or 40s. Comparing yourself to others is never healthy or in any way helpful. When you are looking back on your life, you want to be smiling in nostalgia at your fulfilling and rich life. So be ambitious and positive, strive for what makes you happy!

If you have any tips for me, please comment below. I’d love to hear from you.

Thanks!

Danni x

Share the love. 🙂